I should not speak unkindly of a computer when I am using it.
Apparently it gets angry.
Very angry.

Well, I am back.
We didn't have dinner.
We had McDonald's.

So, I'm working on the PII 266, finally get video drivers installed on it.
I'm getting it to a usable point, to some degree.
I ran MS/Windows Update.
I waited.
I aged.
I waited some more.
I cleaned out my belly button.
I found Hoffa.
I quit, set it up for auto-updates, and shut down.
I powered the system up this morning to let it collect.
Now I'm watching a snail race across the room as the system patches 56 updates into the system.
I'll be eligible for retirement before this thing is done.

So, we just got back from the in-laws.
If you wonder where all the heat comes from, it is there place.
They keep it shut up, and the air off because the kids might come in and out a lot and no sense in letting the air out.
So, there I am, the fat guy wheezing and sweating and about to pass out.
It was like a sauna.
I'm laying on the tile floor in the bathroom, gasping for air.

The wife is trying to get me in the mood, she is reading from the new Dell catalog that came in the mail today.

I'm livin' the good life.
I'm feelin' lucky.
I went to Taco Bell.
They got my order wrong and gave me extra stuff.

Uh oh, wife is taking her laptop apart.
I can't decide if this is troubleshooting or a new form of foreplay.
If I'm lucky, it'll be both!

Earlier today, I made a comment about how much weight I have gained since high school.
I said don't call me fat.
My three year old called me fat.
Well, she informed me I was fat.

Linux doesn't get crap like Windows.
Linux is clean.
Windows is a dirty, dirty whore.
Linux is sweet, virginal and pristine.
I have an unhackable machine.
It is sitting out in the garage.
Unplugged, offline and in pieces.
I dare you to hack it.

So, I had dinner at my mom's place tonight.
She must have used extra-strength "kill my son" capsules this time around.
I'd hardly finished dinner and the stomacy tremors began.

I'm back.
So, I'm walking around with the three year old on my shoulders.
She proceeds to insert her fingers into my nostrils.
I ask her to remove them.
She keeps digging, probing and jamming them in.
Finally, I tell her she can keep what she finds.
She ends up with seven dollars in singles, a container of lemon rind and a map of Albuquerque, NM.
But my sinuses now feel amazingly clear.

So, yesterday the three year old found a new way to consume cheerios.
My wife was upstairs, heard a commotion and went down to find the three year old upset.
The child had a large mass inside her nostril, well the skin was rather bumpy so something was amiss.
My wife looked, saw the cereal up her nose and ran to get the tweezers.
She got back, the lump was gone and the child was fine.
Wife asked the kid what happened, and how she got rid of the cereal and the kid showed her or made the sound for snorting.
So, the kid snorted o's.