I got fired today
Yep.
My wife isn't all that upset, either.
Of course it was my three year old doing the firing.
She's mad at me.
I ate her m&m candies.
So when I got home I was met at the door by the three year old, she looked at me and said "Daddy, you're fired!" and she stomped off.
I asked what that meant, and she said I had to leave.