I'm going to open a day care.
It'll charge like $5/day for your kid.
It'll be a series of pens set-up.
And an automatic cheerio dispenser that goes off every so often, but with just enough feed for all but one of the kids.
Gotta make 'em tough.
Survival of the fittest.
You want to eat, you gotta get in there.
You aren't tough, you don't eat.
The strong will survive.
The smart will survive.

I get bored at work, cutoff from the outside world.
Yeah, I hit dilbert and bbspot within a few minutes of logging into our phone system.
After that it is cnn, espn, job/career sites then off to wikipedia.
One day I'm going to file an exemption to the firewall for IRC.
My reason is going to be "I'm bored, if I don't gain access to the outside world I'm going to shoot myself."
$5 says the request is denied.
Because I didn't complete the script correctly.

Yo
It is bath time for the kids.
or as I like to think of it "up against the wall and spray 'em time"
Dang.
One of the kids pooped in the tub.
Well, there are tub toys involved.
Along with her sisters.
Now the wife wants to boil and bleach everything.

The wife spent the better part of the day thinking it was Saturday for some reason.
Even though I was at work, got up at 6 and she woke up to the alarm clock.
In any case I'm going to play the "Hey, it is Saturday night card" and see if that means weekend whoopie or not.
Wish me luck.

I just heard one of the kids yell out "I am not ready for you to pull my panties down".
I have no idea why it was said.
I hope to never hear it again.
If I do, my reaction won't be "What?"
It'll be "Where is the damned shotgun?!?!?!?!"

Nite folks, going to go beg the wife for some piece then quiet.

It is Father's Day.
The kids asked me what I wanted to do.
I said, eat fried foods, grilled meats and watch sports.
My wife asked me what I wanted to do.
I said, send the kids over to my mom's place.
She asked why.
I grinned and said so we could practice what made me a father in the first place.
She laughed.
She knew that meant begging, whining and alcohol.

http://www.madtux.org/
I saw an ad from them on the site.
But, I can't click on it.
It would violate the Geneva Convention, apparently.

Lunch time!
Be back later
Unless the wife uses the ham to lure me into something else.
In which case be back two minutes later than the original later.